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Adulting F@%k Cancer Mrs Enginerd

Sifting Through The Past

Photographs. Papers. Triplicate copies of 214 Forms. Certificates. Divorce decrees. Typewritten letters of commendations and gratitude. Notes on the margins of decade old bills. The contents of the last box of heirlooms lays on the carpet floor waited to be collated, recycled, edited. The mission was a success. None of these papers and mementos tug […]

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Adulting F@%k Cancer Mrs Enginerd Project Zach

The Bestest Boy

We drive up to the tiny cottage house, solemn, quiet, amidst a pale soft ray of full moon light. The glow turned everything gray, with small whisps of black and white here and there. The small open front door cast a bright warm inviting luminescence that made one forget about the cold crisp summer air. […]

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Adulting Etiquette F@%k Cancer Mrs Enginerd

10 Things You Should Never Say or Do to a Terminally Ill Cancer Warrior and Their Family

Not sure what to say or do to a family battling cancer or any terminal illness? Look no further! After dealing with canned responses during my mom’s convalescence and funeral, I decided to put together a list of do’s and don’ts. It is our family’s hope that sharing these faux pas will avoid others pain, […]

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Adulting F@%k Cancer Love and Marriage Mrs Enginerd

Death Becomes Her

Throughout my life, the only constant was my grandmother, Delia. Bravely, she took on the role of guardian and caregiver while my mother finished Officer Training School and other responsibilities, thousands of miles away from me. Fort Huachuca had been proven to not be the best place to raise a child, and after a few […]

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F@%k Cancer Mrs Enginerd Poetry

Lost

ANGER. A flury of snow. The fury of a thousand calls and text that will never be sent or seen; The deep ire of learning to live an unchampioned life. The realization that the rotting flesh led to unresolved issues and excess emotional baggage because we couldn’t properly say goodbye. There you lie, Beyond the […]

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Adulting F@%k Cancer Layoff Love and Marriage Mrs Enginerd Poetry Project Zach

About MrsEnginerd

When I started writing under the Mrsenginerd pseudonym I was in the middle of a career shift. My employer had done a reduction in workforce exercise that had left me jobless a month after my 10th anniversary with the company (The Layoff). As a married woman with no kids, there was a lot of free […]

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F@%k Cancer Mrs Enginerd

My First Christmas Without Her

No birthday calls. No running through the airport to meet her at the wrong terminal. No cutesy messages on WhatsApp or Facebook IM… Zero. Nada. Nothing. Only the love remains surrounded by an eerie silence. The void, a great abyss in my soul, that darkens and deepens, obliterating any encounter with a resemblance of joy. […]

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F@%k Cancer Mrs Enginerd

Please and Thank You

This Thanksgiving Day, my first without my mother, I’m taking a moment to address all those who made our life bearable as we witnessed her memories drift away as she gracefully accepted her fate due to Stage IV brain cancer. Read on… According to my Titi (auntie), my mother didn’t hesitate to ordered people around […]

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Adulting F@%k Cancer Love and Marriage Mrs Enginerd

Phone/Text/IM or Visit a Friend

Ever wonder why people keep throwing parties and inviting you, even when you RSVP and don’t show up? When you are doing a really good ghosting job but they don’t take the hint? Let me shed some light on their persistence: People are social creatures. We need the warmth of human touch. Intimacy. Compassion. Comfort. […]

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Adulting F@%k Cancer Mrs Enginerd

The Ranch in Montana

For a couple of weeks now I have been listening to very fervent and passionate retirement plan discussions. Half of my teammates will be eligible to pull the rip chord in the next six months to two years. They are all already in countdown mode or STD – short timer’s disease – since they can’t […]